IR reflects my mood

The death of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg on Friday was a deep blow. I went to sleep filled with anxiety, and woke up on Saturday and it still troubled me greatly. Of course, I knew that the Republicans were going to go ahead and try to ram through a conservative judge, I knew it, they've been planning on taking over the Supreme Court as well and McConnell has proven himself over and over to be a deeply hypocritical and unscrupulous leader. They will find a deeply conservative female judge, preferably blonde a la Fox New anchors, and they will try to ram her through. I just hope there are enough principled Republicans to resist this effort, given that in 2016, they hypocritically bought into McConnell's rationale that they could not replace a Supreme Court justice during an election year because the electorate needed to have a chance to express their vote. 

Well, I didn't do much of anything on Saturday. I hung around the house and did some housekeeping. I wanted to go out somewhere, but realistically, when we have nice weather, and we have millions and millions of southern Californians utterly fed up with the pandemic which is going nowhere, and are tired of staying at home, and many are not even wearing facemasks anymore while the death toll climbs above 200,000 (over 14,000 here in California alone), I knew it would be crowded. I knew people would be on the roads going to the usual places, going to the mountains (although the Angeles Forest is closed for hiking, but the mountain resorts are not), and to the beaches, of course the lines would be very, very long for the beaches. When one drives on the freeway it hardly even seems as if we are in a pandemic, people want to go out and pretend it doesn't exist. The freeways seem as crowded as ever (and I realize that this is in part my fault because I was going out on Friday and saw this). 

Many people are working from home (I am), so why the crowded roads? And what is worse, people are filled with an aggression I've never seen before. The pandemic has not made them more thoughtful or considerate, it has brought out the evil egotistical streak that Trump has cultivated and fed during his misbegotten four years in office. People feel entitled to everything, and one can't even count on them to cover their mouths when out in public, as I have found over and over again when I go out to exercise and people are cycling or jogging or walking right next to me, maskless, sending me into a panic.

Right now it is 8:03 a.m. on Sunday, and I've already had breakfast. I should be going out to walk, I haven't done so in a week (although I have walked plenty at the botanical gardens I have visited). I should, but I am putting it off for now. It will be a hot day today, so now is the time.

Yesterday I was very eager to try some more IR photos, and when it reached 3 p.m., I thought, it is now or never. I loaded up some film holders and took my trusty Travelwide 4x5 camera and drove to downtown Riverside. The traffic was not good, I should add. Too much of it.

I arrived and downtown Riverside around the courthouse is almost empty (as usual). It is not known for being bustling, the shops are nondescript and they basically cater to those who are carrying out court business, such as the unlucky droves who are forced to report for jury duty. I know, I know, it is part of our civic duty, and a society only runs when we carry out our responsibilities as citizens, but it is never a pleasant duty. Well, I was going to photograph.

                                                

This was the first shot I took. I used a shutter speed of 1/30, but given the thinness of the negatives, I think I need to go back to using 1/15th. It is of a downtown plaza next to the courthouse. I thought those trees to the left would pick up more of the IR look, but they didn't. The tree to the right that you can barely see did pick it up. I should have framed the photo better, but then, the complete 4x5 photo is a much better composition. Hopefully, when I received the device known as the Pixl-lator (a device with a diffusor that allows us to scan different formats of film), I will be able to scan complete 4x5 negatives. This plaza area was almost deserted except for a homeless woman off to the side who was grumbling. Many homeless people camp out here.

                                   

I returned to take a photo of the courthouse. It was probably not the best time to do so. The two trees to the left are orange trees, and they have lost much of their fruit by now. The shady area to the right is just a formless blob that I should have avoided, it was not lit up by the sun. I love this building and have never been inside. 

Next I drove to the other side of Mt. Rubidoux, to the dog park. I wanted to photograph this open area because of all the trees. This is not the area where the dog park is located, this is the area which is much more solitary, when you cross the street and approach this undeveloped tract of land next to the riverbed (which is dry). As I arrived, I saw two tattooed Hispanic men walking towards me, and I didn't feel comfortable. I had to edge back to the street hoping to run if they approached me, but they went to the dirt lot where their cars were parked and left. This area is a homeless city, so to speak. Many, many homeless people camp out here, in all seasons. We have an invisible city of homeless people, I would venture to say into the thousands. I didn't frame any of their tents, but if one walks about, one can see them. If they see you taking photos, they call out insults to you, such as one did to me, calling me an "A**hole". 

This last one was more troublesome. I returned to the dog park and decided to try to frame a photo with Mt. Rubidoux. This was not the best vantage point, I should have walked over the traffic bride, I would have gotten more foilage being illuminated. But I tried this shot. I think I will retry, but not this one, instead, the other one. As I was taking the photo a car drove by me and someone threw a bottle in my direction. It crashed on the road (it didn't hit me, thankfully enough) and splintered into pieces. They just drove on peacefully. I have found on several occasions that fellow Latinos hate to see someone such as myself with a big camera taking photos. It isn't the first time I have been called names or had something thrown at me. And always, it is working class Latinos.

That is it, I went to try to get a photo of the fields next to Limonite Avenue but they had been cut down. The illumination on the mountains was not good in any case. So, I drove home and developed these negatives, and this morning, I scanned them. 

I've been thinking, I can't spend my life worrying. I know we have a terrible situation in Washington, but I have to move forward. I think I will go for that walk after all.